By Abdul Latif Hourani
I will be with you in every issue to highlight some important matters that are considered as main drivers for the numerous and increasing cases of breakups/ divorces in this day and age, particularly within the Arab world, as I see it. I might be wrong, but it is a matter of opinion and observation to what is going on around us. I do not want to be biased towards men or women, because each gender is responsible for the failure of certain cases. I will only try to illustrate facts and case studies, and analyze what could be happening inside one person’s mind and how it reflects on his/ her behavior. Basically I will say it like I see it.
Sure I am with women’s rights in education and workplace, for surely this will be reflected positively in the way they raise their children, and in society as a whole, yet everything should be within certain limits and time frames, priorities needs to be identified and this should not interfere with family which should be a priority. No one can deny that women have proven their place in society in many levels and in many careers and reached highest of ranks, but from what I have witnessed that the working woman has drifted towards improving her professional skills and focusing on her career and becoming independent while putting her role that God intended for her in a back seat.
In almost all cultures the male figure should be the provider and caretaker of the family, however, and naturally, not all men are capable of earning what can be sufficient for a very comfortable life and satisfy all needs, here it is not wrong that the wife assist her husband and work, in order to jointly provide all possible requirements for better living standards.
Now, if the man’s income was good enough to provide a comfortable and satisfactory life, In my opinion, it is more appropriate for the woman to stop working, and dedicate her time and energy to her children and husband and home, rather than the kids being raised and looked after by a maid. Motherhood is the greatest and hardest job of all and doing so will not lessen her self-worth or contribution to society on the contrary, keeping in mind that she can always go back to work when the kids are old enough to depend on themselves. In fact, the wife’s support at home, to her husband, is a key factor to his mental comfort, and success and ability to focus on developing himself better. This in turn will reflect on the husband and the family.
What saddens me the most is that there are many families that are well off and yet the woman continues to go after her career and maintain her social circles and activities while leaving her young ones to be looked after by maids or nurseries without even sharing financial responsibilities with her spouse saving all her income to herself. Let me ask you, is this fair?
I will let you be the judge of that.
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