By Rewa Zeinati
From her non-fiction book Nietzsche’s Camel Must Die, An Invitation to Say ‘No’
Note # 54 Friday,
November 2, 2012 at 11:34 a.m.
Because we are raised to see marriage as imprisonment. A jail cell for men, and a “protective wing” for women.
Because we are raised to be so adamant about bachelor parties and bachelorette parties (in more “liberal” communities), convinced, utterly, that after that “wild” night is over, it is all really over, the end, the life sentence, the perpetual restraint, instead of an introduction, every single day, if only we’d bother ourselves enough to notice.
Because we are raised with the expectation that when we reach a “certain age” where marriage is “expected,” we “find” someone and “commit,” instead of committing by desire and by choice.
Because we are raised with the idea that only within marriage can commitment be found.
Because we are raised in such a way that even when we choose and desire to be with someone, and have every intention to last, but somewhere along the unpredictable path, we cease to recognize ourselves anymore, losing admiration for the person we thought we’d never become, we are made to feel obliged to stay and stay and stay.
Because women are raised to keep secrets, and men are raised to keep secrets, from each other, and from themselves, mostly.
Because we are raised to be on different sides of the same team, unaware that we are both fighting the same urges, routines, and temptations.
This status update last night from the same Facebook friend who is relieved to finally read an article that agrees with him, that men and women can’t ever be friends, (Note # 45):
“The day I decide that it is okay to lie everyday about how I truly feel, I will get married.”
I rest my tired, beaten case.