By Enas Rady
Family Counselor & Parent Educator
Have you ever had this moment of saying to yourself: “Aha! That is how to do it? Or “Oh, Why did I not see that before?” You are probably hearing the voice of one of the super moments! Super moments are very special moments of insights that we gain from problems and struggles. Does it sound weird? No, you experienced this before! They are flashes of clarity about a difficult situation that we are facing and we feel suddenly blessed for them for no apparent reason. Sometimes super moments come with answers to our problems, not only real solutions but perfect ones. Sometimes when you rethink about it, you might diminish these moments’ power. Meditations and of course prayers allow these special moments when you clear your mind from inner clutters of thoughts and feelings.
These super moments change our life and the lives of others around us. They turn to be lessons for us to learn from. In our 21st century and on daily basis we face stress and problems that we believe to be a normal thing in our lives. We even think that some stress is positive when it could motivate us to do our best. There is nothing named positive stress, as it is unnatural and unhealthy. Stress usually brings us to a negative state. Stress comes to us in a form of emotional, mental or physical pain. Later pain comes to us with a loud voice of: “Hey! Something here needs to change”. When we say that stress is normal or good, we probably use a neat way to avoid our inner responsibility to do what is needed.
When messages come to us at emotional or mental levels with painful thoughts or negative feelings that no one but ourselves create, how often do we listen to these messages? Most likely we do not listen! Because we were taught- at home and in our education systems- to believe that some stress is going to be important in our life, and that this stress is even good and normal. We believed that and continue to exhaust our natural innate in stressful thoughts and feelings. In fact, in our education, we were never taught how that stress would affect our immune system. We grew up to like some shots of fear and quick hits of anger. These emotions bring addictive chemicals in our blood and many people cannot get into their daily events without that “adrenaline fix”. Some people just keep searching for conflicts and confrontation in situations and in people around them to search for reasons to become angry. If they do not find that fix they feel something missing in their day.
When we submit to such stress in dealing with difficult people, events, thoughts and feelings, we fall to disease in our life. Doctors will never be able to treat us form causes of our disease. It is you and me who are responsible for treatment of these root causes. Only you know the thoughts and feelings that lie at the root of your stress, only you can change your feelings, emotions and thoughts. But how? Well this does not just happen except when you learn how to identify and assess the quality of your own thoughts and feelings. Always ask yourself: What am I thinking right now? How do I feel right now? What is the quality of each? Why am I feeling this way? Consciously answer your questions because this will increase your self-awareness. Think about the positive ones then GO: learn from the messages!