By Suzan A. Resheq
There comes a time in life when obstacles seem extremely overwhelming. You have suffered enough setbacks and you seriously consider giving up your goals and dreams. You start questioning yourself. Maybe you don’t have what it takes to achieve your goal? Maybe you better quit now before you embarrass yourself? Or maybe your ‘genius idea’ isn’t realistic? Suddenly, self-doubt conquers your soul and heart, and despair begins to overpower you.
I hope that in such difficult times you remember the fact that you can actually become your own worst enemy. Sad, but true!
Have you ever noticed that the one person you talk to throughout the day is yourself? You hold conversations with, ask questions to and make observations to all day long. Researches conducted by leading universities around the world conclude that through your inner dialogues, or self-talk, you profoundly influence your mindset, which can either determines your success or pave the way to your failure. Self-doubt, lack of confidence or motivation are all by-products of our inner villain.
So, what do you need to know? You just have to be aware of the monster inside, understand how it works and overpower its sabotaging voice. According to various psychological researches, here are the most common four ways you are your own worst enemy:
Preparing yourself for failures by uttering poor/negative affirmations. One of the biggest mistakes we often make is sending negative messages to ourselves through negative self-talk. “I don’t feel good today” “I feel depressed” “How am I gonna meet these people! I can’t even stand them!” “So what if I lose? Whatever! I will be OK with nothing!” Such messages will actually prepare you to lose as you are sucking the energy and excitement out of yourself. Instead, create a winning mindset throughout the day by positive self-talk. For example, tell yourself that, “today is going to be a great day!” “I feel happy today!” “ I will meet the right people at the right time.” Use affirmations to propel yourself forward. There is nothing better than a winning mindset and affirmations that to go with it. Such a mindset will help you get the best out of your day.
Procrastination. When it comes to self-sabotage, procrastinating is king! Why? According to Psychology Today, a leading mental health magazine, through procrastination we make an intention to act, the time comes, but instead of acting we get lost in our own excuses to justify harmful delays. Therefore, live your day as if you have already accomplished your goal. When your subconscious already believes that you are the person you wish to be, goals are achieved in double time. Act right away and do not give your self a chance to sabotage its own intention through procrastination.
Self-Defeating statements. If you utter self-defeating sentences, you are indeed being negative. So stop! Here are words I hope you never catch yourself saying: “Not to be negative, but..” “I can’t” “ I am not good enough for this position” “I look ugly” “or any negative statement that would put you down. If you don’t have something good to say to yourself, don’t bother speaking.
Negativity. Simply put, negativity destroys your business and your life. Even when certain events in your life knock you down, always find the lesson in them and count your blessings. Every successful leader and entrepreneur is a by-product of the failures they have overcome. Be positive, as everything is a state of mind.
Rebound from setbacks. Rise with a smile on your face. It’s your life.
About The Author: Suzan A. Resheq is a freelance Journalist and editor with 14 years of experience in media. She has written for elite newspapers, such as Jordan Times and Saudi Gazette, on children’s rights, education, youth empowerment, and general social features. Suzan holds a Bachelor of Arts (Honors) in Communication Studies and in Political Science from University of Windsor, Canada. She can be reached at: firstname.lastname@example.org.