By Abdul Latif Hourani
To continue on the topic of marriage and conflicts another pressing issue which in my opinion is more related to psychological matters and one that causes much turmoil in a marriage is when both husband and wife want to be the leader of the family. My advice in such a case is for the woman to absorb her man and understand that men by nature need to feel that they are the authority figure of the family. By all means this doesn’t imply that the man becomes a dictator and makes unrealistic decisions without his wife’s consideration, decisions should be made jointly after discussing options and consequences. But my lady, always do try to allow him to make the final call, and simply accept it.
Two leaders under one roof is a formula that can never work. The woman needs to accept that she belongs to a man and when I say that I don’t mean that he owns you or you own him, on the contrary but you my lady are his honor, his woman, his private dear person and belonging in this context is not wrong in fact it essential.
No matter how smarter you may be than your man or more successful in business or even earning a higher income which is all fine; but never ever make him feel as he is in your shadow, following along. Allow him the higher authority in the family, with you and with his children, believe me when I say he will appreciate the power you give him. It is a man’s thing you see, you could be president of a country but within the family house, you are his wife. Put your stubbornness aside and let go of the reins and let him take over the lead in the family, after all you can get what you want if you convince him … unless he convinces you otherwise.